This facet of my character has got me into trouble more than once. I nearly drove a (slightly hormonal pregnant) friend nuts when I read everything I could find on pregnancy in an effort to support her through a much desired (and long awaited) pregnancy. I spent nearly a year immersed in the mirky world of Harry Potter fanfiction (which I will candidly admit I still miss) becoming a shell of my true self.
With this in mind, I assert that all mothers have a 'parental obsession'. For some, it may be what their child eats (only organic perhaps); for others it may be whether their little precious bundle is sickening for something ("I'm sure she's feeling a bit hot..."); for still others it may be the clothes or accessories in the nursery (only the Boori cot and Bugaboo pram?).
For me it is sleeping. But not just any sleeping: for me it is day sleeping. Bede has always been a good night sleeper, but from a ridiculously early age his day sleeps were variable. It didn't take long for the quality of my day to be dictated by how long and how well he slept and whether (in the early days) he would re-settle after only one sleep cycle. And it took very little for a good day to be turned into a bad day by one missed or unsettled nap (today was unfortunately one of those days).
I read every book I could find on baby sleeping and would flip straight to the cat-nap section desperate for a fail-safe way to
As I have mentioned before on this blog (and in person if you know me), Bede is a comparatively easy baby and is a joy to know and love. I am thankful every day for him. And yet too often I find myself counting the minutes until he is supposed to go to bed next...selfishly wasting the time I should be playing with him, enjoying him.
I hate feeling like this. Yet I know that one day soon he won't need days sleeps...and then...then another parental obsession will rear it's ugly head...who knows what it may be? Tantrums? Discipline? Table manners? the potential list is endless!!
So what is the Godly way to deal with my parental obsessions? Prayer would be the place to start. A good mummy network is essential, and has been endlessly helpful (thanks to my Mummy's Group ladies and to my Biblestudy ladies, not to mention the lovely Moorewomen). I also think accountability is key. Someone to talk to who is good at keeping things in perspective for me, maybe (in fact preferably) someone who has a much more demanding and high maintenance baby.
So I'll throw it out to the ether: what is your parental obsession? how do you keep your perspective in a godly way?
I was sitting here thinking I didn't have an obsession and then it hit me... Maybe my obsession is a lack of obsession! Let me make it a bit clearer. I am not obsessed with routines at all. So perhaps my obsession is with flexibility.
ReplyDeleteI tried very hard right from the beginning to make sure my life didn't revolve around my baby's sleeps/feeds/nappy changes. If I had to go out, he came with me regargless of the time. We fed, slept and nappy changed wherever we were and I guess that is why he is such a flexible baby. He sleeps in any cot/port-a-cot/pram when he is tired and eats the home-made food I pack when he is ready. Admittedly he has put himself into a basic routine and eats and sleeps at around the same time each day but he can also wait over an hour past his tired stage for a chance to sleep with very little fuss or crying.
So what is my obsession??? To have a flexible baby who is a huge part of my beautiful family but not the centre of it where life has to revolve totally around him! And I love him absolutely to bits!!!!!