And so we wait. The Project goes in next week and it is well on the way to completion (97% done...); then 2 exams, then Luke's life at College and our life in community really begins to wind down.
Other couples/families who are also finishing are starting to book their movers, and get packing boxes so they can begin the arduous yet now familiar task of de-cluttering and packing up the flat/home.
And we still wait. I could start packing boxes and getting Luke to carry them down to our garage. It will make my life easier in the long run if I do. I know it will.
But I am reluctant. I feel like if I start packing, I move out of my accustomed home in Egypt where College never ends and community (and friendships) lasts for ever, and into the more harsh and scary world of reality where we have only about 6 weeks until we have to be out of our College accommodation.
I still wait. I still want to know where we are moving too before I pack. It's silly. It's procrastination gone mad. I don't even like Egypt all that much. The real world has its upsides.
But it also has one big downside that I am currently the most afraid of: Isolation and Loneliness. It's funny because I don't take as much advantage of community living as I should. I don't go to coffee at someone's house every day and I don't leave Bede with someone else when things get hard. But I could. And that is the hard thing.
Knowing that soon, I won't be able to just drop in on friends and neighbours at Moorewest; knowing that my closest friend could live ages away. And knowing that if Bede is having a meltdown-y kind of day that it really is all down to me- no Moorewest friend will walk in and say "Let me take him while you go for a coffee". I haven't really let them. But they could. And it's that eventuality that I am really dreading.
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